Yes We Can - Make A Change

Given the tenor of our current politics, McCain's constant character assisination of Obama and now his (McCain's) VP pick, Debra got revved up, joined the Barack Obama campaign and even started a blog which you can read here.

I mention this here and it might not seem like something that a Zen Buddhist website should "stay away form," when in truth - social and political activism is something that we can and should embrace to encourage positive change. Zen isn't about leaving the world, it's about being fully engaged.

Deb's initial post about her father who is an Air Force veteran gives a clear example about what's wrong in the life of an everyday American and something we need to fix. Our country has become a dilapidated house. Let's get to work on it. Yes We Can, Yes We Can, Yes We Can. You just have to be able to have and act on Hope.

Namaste'

Jaye Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

Make no mistake

"Tenderness and kindness are not signs of weakness and despair, but manifestations of strength and resolutions."

Khalil Gibran

Virus Within The mind

Sometimes we get into patterns of behavior that are not helpful to us. As a matter of fact there are some behaviors that are down-right destructive. Some does something to us, later they apologize or attempt to make up for it, yet instead of extending forgiveness, we hold a resentment - and build a negative wall of energy and emotion. I tend to think of these instances as bad computer code or a virus that it executing its malicious code.

You might ask how this virus or poorly written code gets in us? To that question, I might have a part or small piece of an answer. When we are growing up or just moving though our daily life, a part of us is programmed by our experience. It often has a very powerful effect on us. Some might experience rejection, verbal or physical abuse, or some other sort of negative experience that has a powerful impact on the psyche and code is then written or inserted into us. On top of that there is the tendency that we know that this virus is there and we intentionally hold on to it. We usually call this holding on "resentments, grudges, emotional scars or wounds."

If this virus or poorly written code goes unchecked, it has the ability to expand and consume more and more of our psychological, emotional, physical and spiritual resources. Unchecked and allowed to run rampant, eventually the dysfunction can become so pervasive that we can begin to not only have self-defeating behaviors, but actually shut down. Due to my line of work, I meet a lot of people who want to shut down, either through the use of alcohol and other drugs, eating disorders or thoughts and feelings that they would prefer to end their life. All of these things are signs that the virus code written into their brain has become to strong. It cannot be dealt with alone.

Towards a solution, every serious spiritual or religious tradition encourages us to meditate. The way I was taught through the Rinzai Zen tradition, it's is to have the capacity to rest in the Buddha, Dharma and Sangha. By resting in our selected path, we have the opportunity to allow the mud, dirt and turmoil created by the virus in our mind to drop and we can cease being deluded. Not enlightened.... just not deluded. And as we allow the virus to pass from us, we progressively find it possible not to be dominated and mismanaged by the self-centered nature of this delusional force. In essence we can become genuinely free.

Genjo Osho says, "Sitting on the [meditation] cushion is not a pretty picture. We want to runaway [from ourselves]." True, true, true. But with consistent and strong effort and determination we can gain our so-called "Center," and be free of this virus within the mind.

May Your Life Go Well,

Jaye Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

Upholding the Buddha Way

"Having received a human life, do not waste the passing moments. Already upholding the Buddha Way, why would you indulge in the sparks from a flint? After all, form is like a dewdrop on the grass. Human life is like a flash of lightening, transient and illusory, gone in a moment."

Dogen Zenji
Excerpt - Enlightenment Unfolds

No Gap or Separation

Genjo Osho delivers another remarkable teisho (trans. Place where the truth is), entitled "Kyozan asks Sansho his Name," which is case 68 of the Hekiganroku (Blue Cliff Record).

Using Hakuin's song of Zazen as a starting point, Genjo Osho with clarity points towards the contradiction of All beings being fundementally Buddha, but at the same time, there are so many disturbing things that happen in the world.

Genjo Osho encourages us to embody our so-called "True Nature," and sit on the cushion of Zazen and face ourselves bravely, rather than run from ourselves. He remarks this is truly a "brave act," because in sitting Zazen "we don't find a pretty picture. Everybody is ready to runaway because of what we see" But by our dedicated Zen practice, we have the capacity to move beyond separation into a space of unification with all beings and all things.

This point is dramatically illustrated by Genjo Osho when he expresses how we are all interconnected and as he says that we have the ability to "command the center." He delivers an amazing expression of Dharma when he says, "When you experience the wind chime singing, you begin to realize the wind chimes True Nature within you. It's as though the wind chime is ringing right within your heart. From the Zen prospective there is no separation whatsoever. So when then the wind chime rings, if you open yourself to 'what is it', you ring too. You experience the ringing from inside."

You can download this teisho from either Switchpod or iTunes. Search under "Zen," or "Choboji." Either way it's 100% free to download. I just hope that you enjoy it and that it insires you as much as it inspires and pushes me along in my practice.

Namaste'

Jaye Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

To Give More Than We Take

Over the weekend, I was talking with my daughter about getting ready for the coming school year. One of the projects she wanted to completed was overhauling her room which included getting rid of all the clothes that no longer fit or never actually wore.

As she worked and the piles got bigger, I noticed she had went and got some shopping bags and brought them back. That got me motivated to cleanup out her sisters drawers and closets, because I understood my daughters plan.

As we worked though the project, neatly folding the clothes and placing them in bags, I thought about the expression, "Give more than we take." It sounds simple, but living in a culture that teaches and tells you to extract everything that you can from life, other people, the environment and not to worry about the consequences, it can be a little tough. It's almost a supernatural force. The Dalai Lama once said that he was driving though New York City. As they moved down the street he was looking in all the windows at all the "pretty" objects. He said that once he got to his destination that he felt very relieved because just that little exposure produced "powerful cravings and desires to have those things."

Perhaps when we give, it enables use to sever that connection just a little. In giving more than we take, we are also reminded to be generous to others, as we are all interconnected. Kindness is a great gift, especially when it comes from a young child who is pointing the Way to doing what is right.

Namaste'

Jaye Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

The Attack

Coming home and catching a little news last night, the big story was Barrack Obama hitting John McCain fin a TV ad for not knowing how many houses he has. McCain stuck back with an amazing vicious ad. The only thing he didn't do, was overtly use the "N" word toward him (though technically his actions do). Instead of talking about the issues that really matter, it's become a matter of mostly McCain tearing Obama down by chopping at the foundation of this being, challenging the nature of his character.

This got me to thinking about what happens in our own everyday lives. Do we embrace or do we push others away? How do I place myself in your mind? Do I use my words and behavior to enter your mind, being cruel and rude or do I make an effort to be within your mind with kindness and compassion?

The other day, I was dealing with someone who was "taking my inventory," and in an odd way, though they don't know my character... verbally attacked me in a fairly passive/aggressive manner. On top of this, they wanted to talk about a sucject wherein they had not real intention of listening to the answer. Going though the process made me very sad. Personally, I despise sparring, hacking at and battling with people. It's generally unpleasant and almost always counter-productive. It's too easy and intellectually lazy to say to a person you are ________________ (fill in your favorite adjective to describe what you think of them).

My personal reaction is to walk away from people like that. Why? Because beating up on people intellectually is nothing more than a form of abuse (which as mentioned above, John McCain seems all too comfortable with). That is not going to unify, it's going to break people, places and things. How can I genuinely gain benefit for ripping and tearing at you? here might be a short term gain or superiority or satisfaction, but in the long run the resulting effects are terrible.

So the question becomes, what can we do? There is a possible solution and actually my preferred solution that I strive to follow. It goes like this "I will be reverential and mindful with all life; I will not be violent nor will I kill." For me that means not just physically but also intellectually, emotionally and spiritually. I find that I don't have to be perfect at this, just honestly engaged in the effort, understanding the possible benefits of living This Way.

May All Beings Be Happy and Free,

Jaye Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

Site update

I was unable to get my post up today, due to a technical difficult with the company that I digitalZENDO at. Obviously the problem has been resolved and we will be back on track for tomorrow. I appreciate your support.

Namaste'

Jaye Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

To Receive Kindness

Much of the time my is centered in a principle that says, "give more than you take." So generally as I move through my life, when an opportunity presents itself to give and it intuitively feels like the right thing to do, I just do it. I don't think about it or analyze.

Then there are these other moments when someone gives me kindness, yet I myself have a bit of difficult receiving. It's like I feel almost embarrassed or analyze why they are doing that. But in the flip-side of that, if someone gives us "unkindness," we have no trouble holding that at all. Such is the divided nature of our (small) mind (as opposed to our awakened Mind).

Perhaps this is a point of practice for us. When someone says, "great job," instead of saying - "oh it was nothing," simply say and embrace "thank you." If someone offers help and support - receive it, it will help resolve what is going on more quickly. This is a deep and important aspect of humility. It's not just having the ability to speak, but also the ability to listen.

Maybe the final aspect of receiving is learning "not" to receive the so-called "negatives" so easily. If someone is rude, abusive, unkind - not only can we not take it personally, but also remember that others emotional baggage does not belong to us. It's not ours to carry. If they are interested in carrying it, fine. It we are interested in carry it, not so fine. Why? Because it costs too much to carry it. It's as simple as that.

The next time someone show us a kindness, let's fully receive it and embrace it. In this way we have another opportunity to so-called, "Unify our heart and being."

May Your Life Go Well,

Jaye Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

What is Your Motivation?

During Genjo Osho's Dharma Trasnmission ceremony, Eido Shimano Roshi asked him, "What was your motivation, in coming to Zen?" Genjo Osho replied, "Shu Jo Mu Hen Sei Dan Do," or translated into english, "However innumerable All Beings are, I vow to save them All." A deep, clear and beautiful response. Eido Roshi then asked Genjo Osho, "What will your motivation be going forward?" Genjo Osho replied, "Shu Jo Mu Hen Sei Gan Do." This response is like hearing a lion or tiger roar, for the first time.

When I came to Zen it was for a simple reason. I was afraid to die and what an answer to what would happen to me when I passed. I wanted kensho (elightenment) A friend from Rochester Zen Center told me, "Sit and you'll find out." I wanted an answer for me, but not for you. What a selfish starting point.

Along the years of practice, particularly at Dai Bosatsu Zendo, I came to realize that my practice was not for myself but rather "All sentient Being." This may sound crazy, grandiose or like an overwhelming form of dementia but my practice is what it is. Butsu Do Mu Jo Sei Gan Jo - or in plain english, "However endless the Buddha (trans. awakenings) path is, I vow to follow it." And I would add, "ceaselessly."

In caring forward our motivation to practice Buddhism, it's can be important to remember that Zen does not only happen in a Zendo. It is every moment, every where. Maybe this is why motivation can be so important. To practice every moment, every where requires a certain focus, attentiveness and/or fortitude (spiritual strength for the endurance of hardships). Without proper motivation we can drift, like a rudderless boat.

Personally, I think whatever reason a person comes to practice is okay, because we all have the capacity to grow, adapt and change. The key is to have the intellectual and emotional flexibility to give ourselves permission to flow with that growth and development.

Gassho (In Gratitude),

Jaye Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

Visitor Note

The other day someone mentioned to me that they did a comment, but had to register as a google/gmail user. Maybe it's poor interface design or google's part, if you scroll down there are other options that do not require you to have a google account.

Thanks A Lot,

Jaye Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

Our Vast Nature

"What our Zen practice does do for us is help us realize that we are so much more than our bumpkin nature. In the readiness of time, we begin to come to terms with the vastness of our True Nature"

Genjo Marinello Osho
Excerpt | Plum Mountain Newsletter - Volume 15.2 Summer 2008

True Progress

"We are life the son of a rich man who wandered away among the poor. We are like a man who, in the midst of water, cries in thirst so imploringly." - Song of Zazen


We want, we want, still we cannot have enough. Somehow, we think we have to make progress. We want progress. But true progress is to realize that we are like the son of a rich man. We already are in the midst of water so there's no need to cry in thirst so imploringly. To realize this is to make true progress.

Eido Shimano Roshi
Excerpt | Points of Departure - Zen Buddhism with a Rinzai View

Remember Who You Are

Sometimes, we can forget who we are and stop acting on our core values and stop being true to ourselves. Entering these states can lead us to feel frustrated, demoralized and in some instances depressed - because the suffering from not being "true to ourselves" can be so intense. How and why it happens can be an interesting study.

One thing that I've experienced is spending too much time living in others approval systems. Dealing with my brother is an excellent example. When I was a teenager, I did somethings that really disappointed him. What it has translated into for him is a condescension. As such since he feels that I am unworthy of his care and respect, there is nothing that I can do to make him happy. No way or path that he will forgive me for when I was a kid.

In attempting to live in his approval system, I managed to get off balance with myself. I came to a point some years ago where I asked, "who am I living this life for? Is it for him or myself?" The answer surprised me, upon reflection. It was him. Once I identified that truth, I began the process of changing that thinking and behavior. Once I did that, I instantly felt a relief.

A second thing that is a slightly different take on what I went through with my bother is the issue of taking on things that don't belong to me. I have been in situations where people were really negative. They'd run people down-back biting and gossiping, be verbally abusive and just make things unpleasant. There can be the tendency on our part to absorb this negative energy. In fact we take so much of it in, that it starts to erase our memory and we forget who we are and begin acting as they act and kind of join in and perhaps not even notice it. In effect we become toxic, because we had become someone else's emotional dumping group.

There are a couple mindsets that I use that are helpful at times, that I have learned over the years. The first mindset is what Seigan taught me when I was a DBZ. "The pain is not yours." There are a lot of painful things that happen during the journey of our life, but they are not ours.

The second mindset is "don't be distracted by the risings." Though things call to us to leave our path, the basic deal is just sticking to the path. If we get pulled into an emotional jungle, it may be difficult to make it back to your path. This is especially true if you didn't bring a machete to help you cut through the emotional crap.

The third mindset that might help is "Too thine own self be true." This is an expression used quite a bit around Twelve Step programs. Though most of us aren't in one, it makes an excellent point. If I'm not being true, like a well shaped wheel, what am I being?

The ultimate point it to be what I generally call "authentic." Rinzai once said, "Do you know where your disease lies? You diease lies in the fact that you have no faith in yourself. Because you have no faith in yourself (and not true to yourself), you are not your own true master. And since you are not your own master and pushed this way and that by others, you will suffer (greatly).

I ask that you think on this. Let us know your thoughts. May your life go well.

Namaste'

Jaye Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

Not What You Think

Yesterday I was talking with someone who practices Buddhism with a group that I was previously unaware of in Salisbury. Talking about Buddhism and their "format," they said they sit for about 15 minutes and then read from a selected text and discuss it, etc, etc...

Later in the discuss they asked what "kind' of Buddhism that I practiced. I jokingly replied, "The kind that hurts." I didn't actually bother to explain about the 45 minute sits and the lack of talking. I didn't think there was a point in doing this, however it did get me thinking a little.

They asked me why I practice and the "school" of Buddhism that I follow. My response was "Rinzai Zen Buddhism" and "to cease being deluded, not only for myself but all sentient being." They asked me what I meant by that and was it possible. I told them that "all beings are enlightened without fail, but most of us are stuck in a fog bank. Though practice, the fog lifts and we finally experience, embody and see who we genuinely are." The translation is, Yes it's possible.

The response I got back was, "How you describe it is not how I've thought or heard about it." My response was, "Experience is often, not what we think."

Gassho,

Jaye Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

That which affirms our purpose

Great Vows for All

Shujo Mu Hen Seigan Do
Bo No Mu Jin Seigan Dan
Ho Mon Mu Ryo Seigan Gaku
Butsudo Mu Jo Seigan Jo

However innumerable all beings are, I vow to help them all
However inexhaustible delusions are, I vow to extinguish them all
However immeasurable Dharma teaching are, I vow to master them all
However endless the Buddhas Way is, I vow to follow it.

Translation | Eido Shimano Roshi

Projecting the Mind

I was talking with someone today about the upcoming week. Their basic position was, "Man am I dreading the week. There's so much to do, I'm not sure how it's going to get done."

When we look down the path, projecting our mind, we tend to see the difficulties, obstacles and the challenges that are in front of us. Once we visualize them our bodies and brains go into self-protection mode and we harden ourselves to something that has not come into being yet, just the projection in our mind.

Now don't get me wrong. Everything this person was saying could be correct. But what concerns me most is the attitude that I hold within my mind. Am I my ally or my enemy. Am I living in such a way that allows me to harmonize with myself and others, or am I isolated and in dysfunction? Buddha said, "As we think, so we become." As we project and envision, so we fulfill.

Namaste'

Jaye Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

Thoughts on Character

"Man is made or unmade by himself; in the armory of thought he forges the weapons by which he destroys himself. He also fashions the tools with which he builds for himself heavenly mansions of joy and strength and peace. By the right choice and true application of thought, man ascends to the Divine Perfection; by the abuse and wrong application of thought, he descends below the level of the beast. Between these two extremes are all the grades of character, and man is their maker and master.

Of all the beautiful truths pertaining to the soul which have been restored and brought to light in this age, none is more gladdening or fruitful of divine promise and confidence than this - that man is the master of thought, the molder of character, and maker and shaper of condition, environment, and destiny."

James Allen
Excerpt | As A Man Thinketh

Dark Spot

Having gotten back from Pittsburgh, I'm still processing some of the events from while I was there. One of the things that came up for me was the "Time Warp." The time warp is the fact that I had to step into the past. On my way up there, that potentially never occurred to me.

Entering the time-warp forced me to think about and confront some things that I just haven't had to deal with in almost 30 years. That so-called "Dark Spot," that I had to deal with is the fact that I was a "Bad Kid." I was always into something, rarely listened well and caused a lot of problems for myself.

The troubled child, continued on to be a troubled teen, but what most people don't understand is that I had been diagnosed with Major Depression and had also been through some trauma which in part influenced me to a greater or lesser degree to be reckless and self-destructive. This was even to the extent of attempting to commit suicide several times in my teens. I must say, I'm I didn't succeed, because I would have missed out on my wonderful wife and two beautiful daughters that make me laugh all the time.

Along my journey, I followed in my fathers footsteps into a life of addiction to alcohol and other drugs. The result was that I was emotionally unavailable to my and to others. It further influenced me into the person that I didn't want to be.

So the question is what changed? A couple things. One is I got introduced to a Twelve Step Fellowship that was a real window of opportunity to not just find happiness, but live it. I also encountered Zen, which has been a mainstay for unifying my life. It was actually Zen books by Master Dogen that helped me to see what I was doing to myself and build the desire for meaningful change. And lastly the world didn't change for me, I did. The fact of the matter is that in my youth, I was out of alignment, physically, mentally and spiritually. Though I didn't cause my depressive disorder or the genetic vulnerability for addiction, I was responsible for treating them effectively, once I was aware that I had the disease/disorder. In taking responsibility I now have twenty-one years of recovery from active addiction. That's kinda cool.

I like to remember that, "The past does not equal the future." That person who was a "dark spot" may still exist for those people in Pittsburgh, but it no longer exists for me. Just because people want to stick labels on us, doesn't mean that we have to wear them, like a scarlet letter. No thanks. That game is no fun for you or I. On top of that, those labels people like to use are more a comment on them than me. As I like to say, "I cannot live backwards. I'm only willing to live forward."

As for anything else concerning being a "Dark Spot," I've made amends and this process continues ceaselessly, though my Zen practice. I've changed my behavior. We are not finding ourselves. We are deciding ourselves and who we are to be moment after moment.

May All Beings Be Happy and Free,

Jaye Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

Gift of Light

"A miracle is a gift of light, not a gift of worldly goodies. It shines through the world I see. Each new crack in the scenery tells me there is something else going on behind this play I think I'm in."

Hugh Prather
Excerpt | Spiritual Notes to Myself

Appreciate This Moment

For the last week or so, I've been in a kind of bubble. I've been under a lot of stress since my Aunt dying last week. I can tell that just by the number of migraines that I'd been having. yesterday was the first time in about a week that I haven't had one.

Moving forward and getting back into rhythm, I can only say that I'm glad to be home. There is a certain feeling of comfort that I get from being home with the girls. Maybe a simple work to express my feeling would be "Appreciation."

I can appreciate the kids tormenting each other, Deb making for of her 80's playlists in iTunes and especially the conversations that we have. I can just appreciate the opportunities to spend time being. And if I really want, I can decide to apreciate this moment.

If we can't find things in our life to appreciate, to say "wow, that's really nice" or "I really enjoy that," we might be missing something. That's important. When I'm fully recharged and re-synced I'll blog more. Talk with you soon.

Namaste'

Jaye Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

A Home Going

The best expression on life and death that I can recall ever hearing was from Roshi Philip Kapleau, in his book, "Zen - Merging East and West." The short version is to think of yourself as a wave on the ocean. For a time that wave is in many ways, separate, distinct, has it's own sense of character and lifespan as a wave. And once the wave has exhausted itself, it throw off the illusion that it was ever *really* separate from the ocean on which it rode and full and clearly merges and is seen as one." It is the beginningless, beginning. The endless end.

Before I had first gone to Dai Bosatsu Zendo, Junpo said something that I thought was kind of odd. He said, "Come home soon." At that time I could not fully appreciate the depth of his encouragement. But now, I can see a just a little further down the road and so it means something a little different.

So today is the formal recognition of Aunt Polly's Home Going. The funeral is today at 11:00AM, here in Pittsburgh. We will honor her life, her memory and not just who she was, but who she IS and how that continues on.

Though, I may not have talked about it directly over the last couple days, the grief in my family is very strong, very real and very present. There have been times when I have been alone that the tears just come from no-where. I have a thousand different feelings and sometimes when we are authentic, there is no "emotional ballet" left. This moment has been especially hard on my Mother. Last night she apologized for crying and I told her, "how does the right action ever need an apology?" This is another moment when the masks have to go. No falsehood, no illusion, no holding back. If we Love Aunt Polly, now is the time and moment that come out. It's alright.

In closing, I want to thank the many people who have not only sent my family and I private emails but Twitters to "jayezero," as well. They have really been very kind and supportive and I'm appreciative of that.

"Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Tears stream down your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down your face
And I...

Tears stream down on your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face
And I...

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you." ~Coldplay



Namaste'

Jaye Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

Among No One

"Distinguished among no one.
Realizing my freedom only through my humanity.
No one to do this.
Only some Way.
Complete!
My words are a hindrance.
Without some reference.
The line of mine or others.
Invisible!
How could it matter?
Can expression express without some place to stand?
Giving us now.
Writing this one line forever upon life for some "piece of mine".
Ironic!
To hear some steps.
Footprints falling through my mind.
So much fun.
Really, as watching is my life."

Contributed By | Jason Broome