digitalZENDO

The Apology

2009-12-29T07:49:00.007-05:00

Last night I was talking with someone who was struggling on the issue of making an apology. They said, "I'm finding it hard to apologize, because I'm afraid that they won't believe me." My response was, "We are powerless over whether or not someone will accept an apology. For me what is most essential is that if I make an apology, I feel like I need to harmonize my actions with my words. It's then that they and I may know the sincerity that I'm expressing. If this doesn't happen in the moment, then perhaps with time as my actions are more consistent, they may accept my effort to heal the wound or gap that stands between us."

This morning as I sat with the thoughts and feelings on "sincerity," and "apology," it clarified into a single principle of "Amends." In looking at the word amends, it means to heal or fix that which was once broken. For me it also means coming to understand what can sometimes cause me to create wounds or injuries with myself, others and the environment. That internal force is what I sometimes define as self-centeredness or self-obsession. To reduce hurting self and others, I have to address those particular traits.

The hardest aspect of Zazen (Sitting to unify the mind), is facing oneself on the black cushion. It can be difficult to see, hear, touch, taste and smell the results of some of our actions. To make progress, I've had to as Zen Master Dogen said, study myself. In the process of studying the self he then says to "Forget the self and in this way you will come to know enlightenment." My current feeling is that the self that he's talking about forgetting... dissolving... is the self-centered, self-obsessed tendencies that raise ten-thousand barriers in our life, creating brokenness, gaps, injuries, wounds and at times heartbreak.

In learning breath by breath to unify heart-mind, my experience is that the grip of self-centeredness and self-obsession are lessened. Once lessened it can become much easier to harmonize our words and actions, bringing forth a kind of healing that can remove the gaps and problems that we can sometimes create, with ourselves and others. It's from that place that true amends (changes in mentality and behavior) can bloom.

In my life, I have to admit, I've managed to do some things large and small that require an apology, so that I can feel right with myself and others, reducing suffering and enabling me to live forward, rather than backwards. But the only this can sincerely be completed is by diligently working to unify or heart-mind.

Love All - Serve All - Every Single Day,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

For My Father's Memory

2009-12-28T07:05:00.004-05:00

Last evening, prior to the sunset, I traveled to the ocean. Hearing the beautiful roar of the waves, the cool wind on my face, seeing the rolling waves, below the amber and orange light receding in the south, I thought of my father. He might have liked This moment very much.

As I sat in front of the ocean that looked so vast, I was able to recall and say Bodhisattva's Vow, for the memory of my father. The words... the feeling... goes like this...

"When I, a student of Dharma,
Look at the real form of the universe,
All is the never-failing manifestation
Of the mysterious truth of the Tathagata.
In any event, in any moment, and in any place,
None can be other than the marvelous revelation
Of its glorious light.
This realization made our patriarchs and virtuous Zen masters
Extend tender care, with the heart of worshipping,
Even to such beings as beasts and birds.
This realization teaches us that our daily food and drink,
Clothes and protections of life, are the warm flesh and blood,
The merciful incarnation of Buddha.
Who can be ungrateful or not respectful
Even to senseless things, not to speak of man?
Even though he may be a fool,
Be warm and compassionate toward him.
If by an chance he should turn against us,
And become a sworn enemy, and abuse and persecute us, we should
Bow down with humble words, in reverent belief
That he is the merciful avatar of Buddha
Who uses devices to emancipate us from sinful karma
That has been produced and accumulated upon ourselves
By our own egoistic delusion and attachment
Through the countless cycles of Kalpa.
Then on each moment's flash of our thought
There will grow a lotus flower,
And on each lotus flower will be revealed a Buddha.
These Buddhas will glorify Sukhavati,
The Pure Land, every moment and everywhere.
May we extend This mind over the whole Universe
So that we and all beings together
May attain maturity in Buddha's wisdom."

May All Beings Be Free Of Suffering,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

Happiness Is You

2009-12-24T07:57:00.004-05:00

I really love this short 3 minute talk on the fact that "Happiness is up to you," from Sogyal Rinpoche'. In a simply, gentle and powerful way, he reminds and shows that what is most essential in our life is working with our mind.

Happiness Is You,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

Open Being

2009-12-23T06:03:00.005-05:00

This morning after zazen (sitting with unified mind) I remembered a Taoist expression "Each day that I wake, I make my mind a blank slate, to write the new days lesson upon." My internal dialog said, "It's sooooo tough to drop what we think we know... the labels... the book knowledge... our collected facts and figures... the past reference points of experience... the habit and patterns... the effort to predict... and just be truly alive, fresh and open, like entering a room for the very first time." I call this "Open Being."

The effort to dust of my psychological blackboard is a powerful exercise for my life that I've been experimenting with. When I run into people that I know or deal with on a regular basis, the moment I get that sense, feeling or thought that I "know," what's going on with them, I make the conscious effort to drop the it. I say to myself, "Drop the labels, drop the history, drop whatever you think you know. See, hear and feel them, as though this was the very first time you've ever met."

I noticed when I started working with my mind is this way, how much I can put people in a kind of "box," filled with labels. I noticed that I do this to gain a sense of comfort and security about the person that I'm dealing with. In attempting to gain that sense of security, I realized some things that I needed to ask myself. "Am I seeing you as you are or am I seeing you as my labels and views define you? Am I narrowing who you are? Are my labels and mental-map of you getting in the way understanding what you're expressing in the moment? Do I have the skills... the compassion... to make the moment more spacious, so that I can experience you differently?"

This experiment has proven helpful, because I've noticed and experienced things with people that didn't match-up with the labels that I had been carrying in my mind. I was able to see them and myself in a new light, even if that flash was for 3 minutes. Those lightning flashes have a way of expanding and adding appreciation.

To be honest, practicing with "Open Being," sometimes results in feeling some pain, for various reasons. But other times there was a definite relaxing of tension in my interactions and significantly improved the relationship that I had with the person. It's a window of opportunity to see and feel the moment with the person as it is, rather than what we are projecting.

In closing I'd say, the practice of "Open Being," is simply making the effort to see, feel and experience a person, without allowing the past to some how contaminate the present. It also means not attempting to guess or predict what the person is going to do. It's harmonizing and connecting with exactly with what's presented. Yes it's very difficult, but yes it can be very helpful and rewarding. Just make the effort.

May Your Life Go Well,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

We Are Christmas

2009-12-22T07:03:00.004-05:00

As we speed towards Christmas Day and things get frenzied, I wanted to share a little, before things get any more hectic for both of us. It's important to do, because I feel it's what matters most. We are Christmas!

One of my favorite koans that I worked with goes, "A student asked Ummon, what will it be, when the tree withers and the leaves fall? Ummon replied, Golden Wind!" This is so simple, clear and beautiful.

For those who are not in the know, "Golden wind," is another way of saying "Autumn," in China, because of the changing of the leaves color. It is also a way of saying, You will embody... you are the season. In this there is no doubt, for me.

Now in the heart of Winter, days away from Christmas, all the leaves have fallen to the ground and where I live there is a wide covering of snow. To my eyes, everything looks out and exposed, but at the same time very beautiful. The sunlight reflecting off the snow makes it seem exactly what my teacher, Genjo Marinello, Osho says... "The whole world is shining."

As I run around looking for the "right" gifts, in my effort to make it a "good" Christmas for a few that are close to me, especially my kids, I think and try to feel what they will be unwrapping. The truth is, we want people to unwrap a reflection of our inner light and who we are, so that they know how much we love them. We want to see that smile and receive that embrace of a hug that says, "I see you too, just as you saw me." This is perfectly fine. But I look deeper still, pushed on by the voice of my teacher.

When the presents are opened, the gift warp collected and thrown away, who is Christmas then? We are the body of Christmas.

To me Christmas says, love everybody... be kind... have hope... act with compassion and sincerity... no barriers... no gaps... no distance... all being is seamless, with no host or guest.

I know this may seem like hocus-pocus, fluffy minded thinking or "okay, sure, yeah right," skepticism, but we are Christmas itself. And this does not just apply to the 25th of December, but every day, just like every day we are Buddha. The only way however to genuinely find that out is to sit and work with our own mind, dissolving and melting the million snowflakes of distraction that influence us to think and feel that we are something different... something not Christmas...

As we live our life, we are constantly unwrapping and unfolding ourselves. My most sincere hope and effort is that we come to be awakened enough to see, realize and appreciate that, "We are Christmas," not just on that single day on the 25th of December, but every day before and after, as we unwrap and unfold ourselves within the range of each other, Buddha to Buddha, Mind to Mind.

Happy Holiday!

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

Learning To Swim

2009-12-21T07:25:00.003-05:00

Genjo Mainello Osho recently gave a teisho called "The Foreigner has No Beard," from the fourth case in the "Gateless Barrier." My teachers Dharma discourse had a deeply meaningful impact on me as he talked at some moments very subtly and other times very profoundly on learning how to so-called "swim," in one's life and not drown amid our life circumstances. It was so "straight on" in fact that my eyes found tears, because I knew precisely what he expressed.

Early in his teisho, Genjo Osho said, "…With only dokusan once a day, even for Dharma Teachers, that's a lot of sitting and a lot of time to face who we are, sit after sit after sit. And to come across all the potential, you could say delusions and distractions that we might call hindrances. But learning how to swim in all these potential distractions, delusions and hindrances is how we really become, I think it's right to say, mature students of the way. It's because we are able to swim and not drown and not so-called down in distractions, hindrances, delusions, attachments, longings, dreams, fantasies, pains, sorrows… fatigue. And as we become mature enough to swim in this really diverse and choppy ocean we become more capable of settling into what might be called our true self or deep self.

I don't like (the word) true-self as it contrasts as a false self to a true self. There is no such distinction. Even self itself is a distinction that divides self from other. It's hard to find language but suffice it so say that when we learn how to swim in the surface waters we then become more comfortable or accessible to the depths. And sesshin (silent retreat to gather the mind) of any kind, whether it's a half-day mini sesshin or eight-day Rohatsu is a time to experiment, with nothing else to do but to learn how to swim. There is no other agenda but to learn how to swim in the midst of what we might think of as adversity."

Learning to not only swim, but being able to do so in the "choppy waters," of life requires a variety of skills, practice and determination. There's much to do with so little time.

Genjo goes much further on developing the skills and confidence, in learning to so-called, "Swim." If you would like to listen the complete teisho, it's available at no-cost at Choboji Podcast site or iTunes. I hope that you take the time to listen as his words provide a kind of "North Star," that can help to guide our practice.

Your In Zen,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

Not Going it Alone

2009-12-18T06:09:00.005-05:00

Yesterday on the Shambhala Sunspace Blog, there was a request that didn't sit so well with me. To quote directly it read, "Do you have a meditation practice and follow the Buddhist teachings but don’t belong to a Buddhist community, or sangha, and don’t have a Buddhist teacher? If so, you’re part of a growing community of unaffiliated Buddhists in North America. In the Spring 2010 issue of Buddhadharma: The Practitioner’s Quarterly we’ll be focusing on unaffiliated Buddhists and we’d like to hear from you."

I've been actively practicing Zen for about 19 years. Overtime my practice has written many chapters through my life. I've had periods that I trained as a monastic and times like the present that I'm not. I've had experiences with and without a sangha or community of Buddhist. And I've certainly had times when I was with and without a teacher. I've had experiences with both sides of the coin.

The straight answer is that people can loosely be classified in various categories or swim lanes. Here are a few that I've noticed and experienced myself:

1. Nice Person or Accidental Buddhist. The nice person Buddhist is one who maybe took a college class on Eastern philosophy, heard about Buddhism from a friend or read a book like "The Three Pillars of Zen," and said "Wow, This is cool. This kinda fits me." There can be a feeling of wanting to be a little more connected with their life, happier, kinder, etc...

Sometimes the nice person Buddhist avoids getting a teacher or joining a Buddhist community/Sangha, because organized structure might feel constricting. I could add that in our culture, there is a very high value placed on being independent and the sense that having those things can make one dependent. Dependence translates into discomfort. The net-result is they just don't want to be directed, managed or controlled. The feeling and notion of Buddhism is kind of a loose frame work that might be a nice outline for life and that's enough or them to feel "okay."

I should note, there's usually not a lot of serious zazen practice going on. If there is, it's frequently random, lacking consistency.

2. Unaffiliated Buddhist. The unaffiliated Buddhist has a stronger connection to the Way than the "Accidental/Nice Person Buddhist." They might be taken with or have a drive for something more that a little growth and development. They have a sense of they can gain some level of enlightenment and set out to see what they can attain.

The unaffiliated is often pretty intellectually clued in to Buddhism. There's an awareness of the Four Noble Truths and Eightfold Path. They may have numerous books on Buddhist practice, use podcasts and have loose associations through channels like twitter and blogging. There is often some thought or effort towards sitting at least once a week for a short period. This can be useful to keeping them moving forward, without the commitment or obligation to a teacher, sangha or Buddhist community.

3. Affiliated Buddhist. These persons are those who have a teacher, providing guidance, direction and support in practice. There is frequently participation and engagement in a Sangha or Buddhist Community. There is awareness that Buddhism is actually a "Team Effort," rather than solo, as most people think.

Generally these person's are on a very directed effort to attain Awakened Mind, to see the truth... know the truth and as much as possible, express Buddhist Vow and Precepts within their life. Zazen practice is consistent, often daily. Affiliated Buddhist frequently make the effort to attend Sesshin (Retreats to gather the mind).

Looking at it from the context of categories helps me to understand that our relationship to Buddhism is a process, not an event. From my experience and perspective, I found it much more helpful to be an "Affiliated Buddhist," rather than "Unaffiliated" for one simple reason. Going it alone can make practice unnecessarily difficult on ourselves.

Visualize yourself, climbing a mountain cliff face that is 1000 feet high. Is it better to go it alone or with someone who has been there before and more experienced? Is it better to gain timely direction and advice when your in a tight or difficult moment or hope you can get back to the book and find the highlighted section that applies? It's useful to remember that Shakyamuni Buddha encouraged real-time, direct support in some fashion, because ceaseless refining is possible.

There is also the issue of hitting various states where one things they might have attained awakening, because of how the mind feels, but in point of fact, it's a kind of hallucination. True Zen is not a game. Just like on a sharp mountain cliff wall, it's possible to loose one's life, in unaffiliated, non-directly supported practice, one can lose a sense of direction and get caught in some unexpected traps and not even realize we're caught, isolated and out of the resources we need, so that we can move forward.

The above being said, I'd say "Please don't go it alone," unless there really is no other choice. Trust me when I say, though we may think of our life and reasonably comfortable and okay, we are out in the wilderness of our life... living beneath the stars... hoping to more than survive the circumstances of our life.

May Your Life Go Well,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

Using Circumstances

2009-12-17T06:06:00.004-05:00

Yesterday, I discussed the current array of challenges that I've been facing. I've been holding it in the context of two questions that are essentially the same. The first is was asked my my teacher. He once asked me, "With no mind and no body, how would you sweep the floor?" The second is from what I mentioned yesterday about the person up a tree.

"Imagine climbing up a tree at the edge of a thousand-foot-high cliff. We grab hold of a branch with our mouth, since we cannot get a hold with our feet and are unable to pull ourselves up with our hands. Just at that moment, a man at the bottom of the tree asking, ‘Why did Bodhidharma come from the West?’ At such a time, were we to open our mouth to answer the man, we would lose our grip and forfeit our life. Were we not to answer, we would make a mistake by failing our responsibility to help all beings. Speak up! What, for goodness sake, should we do at such a time?"

We are always in the heart of a difficult circumstance. We are suspended between past and future, Itself. We may not always feel it... smell it... taste it... notice it... but we really are always there. I'm not stuck in a fog bank on that one. No illusions.

The recent tsunami of being caught between various responsibilities and then being forced to make rapid choices and decisions to fit the immediacy of circumstances has been a walk of unifying my heart. For me, what is important if not more so it the motivation that fills me. It's having the intention to help others and to do so as selflessly as possible. To do it with a heart-mind that is not theorizing about being caring and open, but actually engaged in the process within that moment.

Zen Buddhism is not designed to help us escape our life challenges and problems. If you think or feel that that's the purpose, your going to be very disappointed. Zen which is the experience of unifying our heart-mind is something all together different. For some near 19 years, it has been the process of learning to meet my life circumstances well. Even before my teacher asked me, "With no mind and no body, how will you sweep the floor," life Itself had been asking me the very same question since the day that I was born. Life is constantly asking us to choose... decide... make the choice...

We can use our day-to-day challenges... circumstances... to edge ourselves forward and express the person that we really intend to be.... or not. We can use this moment to as Eido Shimano Roshi used to say, "Improve upon the silence..." or not. We can use this moment of being to express caring... or withhold it. We can use this instance to be the solution... or we can be the problem. We are choosing, deciding, picking and making choices, like it or not.

How are we using circumstances day-to-day? Are we confident that we are capable of meeting them well? I could say that you are, but it means nothing, if you don't believe it yourself.

Love All - Serve All - Every Single Day,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

Cornered By Circumstance

2009-12-16T06:12:00.004-05:00

As I was driving to work on Monday, thinking about some things that I needed to accomplish this week, I received an email from my office. A key person had in our office had been at home, gotten injured and I was retasked to manage their job responsibilities. Knowing the twists, turns, difficulties and nuances of what I was driving into, my mind settled on a key principle. Fortitude.

The reason why fortitude was going to be important was that I knew I would not be able to drop my own job responsibilities and I was going to have to find a way to balance things. I knew I was about to encounter an avalanche. I was wondering what I would use as my shovel.

By the end of the day - Monday, it was clear to me that the avalanche was expanding. The person wouldn't be coming back to work till Thursday. It was going to be a difficult moment. My bodies response was a migraine before I opened my eyes. That was my bodies way of saying..., "You're going to need to find a way to harmonize with a situation that is difficult."

In responding, I took my migraine medication and then looked to gain my footing and center my mind. As I mindfully inhaled and exhaled, I considered what was most important. It was simply the breath that I was taking and the willingness to meet the challenge, by a motivation to simply help others. Nothing fancy.

Today, I remain in the midst of the challenges, still feeling very squeezed by the circumstances. There is no doubt... the tasks are daunting. But it's in difficult moments, we can rise to meet the moment and learn something new about ourselves.

My mind has reflected back to the koan of "Man up a tree," that I mentioned last week. A person is hanging from the top of a tree, gripping the branch with only their teeth. A person comes to the bottom of the tree asking, "What is the meaning of Bodhidharma's coming from the West. If you fail to answer, you evade your responsibilities. If you open your mouth to answer, you fall to your death. Choose." It's true that "The spiritual life doesn't protect us from having to make difficult choices." It's right here. It's right now.

In finding ourselves up a tree, Corned by circumstance, You and I can only answer with our life. Our effort is to answer without mumbling. To be the true answer, it must be clear and distinct. We'll see how today goes... our life is still unfolding. We are still dissolving This. And that is okay.

Your In Zen,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

How To Be Happy

2009-12-15T07:13:00.004-05:00

I thought it would be nice to share Sogyal Rinpoche's teaching on building happiness in our life practice. It's a teaching that can lift the heart and help to move our mind forward, towards home.

With Warm Smiles,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

Stranger In Our Own House

2009-12-14T06:26:00.009-05:00

After sitting zazen yesterday, I had the feeling that Zen practice provides a window of opportunity to be the owner and host rather than a guest and stranger, in this very temporary form called Seiho. That sense was quickly followed by the question, "How many times have you settled for being a guest or stranger to your life, feeling like someone strapped into the passenger seat and taken for a ride, through life?" That answer is more times than I'd care to admit.

Being a guest or stanger in my life is a rather easy state to arrive at. All I have to do is be inattentive, not showing up mentally... emotionally... intellectually... allow myself to get bogged down in the messy circumstances of life. It's life on autopilot, because I'm not mindful. Decisions... Choices... Actions... all seem to be taken by someone else or the circumstances that seem to have a life of their own. It's indeed not so hard to feel as a guest or stranger, not having the surefooted confidence of host or owner of being on one's own home court. There are many things can feel like a disadvantage rather than advantage.

Mastering our life, having confidence, becoming the host and owner doesn't happen by accident. It requires training... practice... conditioning... consistent effort... tenacity... attentiveness... fortitude... appreciation... a sense of compassion... and the ability to be resolute in the face of adversity. This is especially important since our ego can so skillfully misguide us from our goals and sense of who we see ourselves as genuinely being.

In the way of Zen, striving to unify my heart-mind, Genjo Marinello Osho, my teacher is always reminding me... "Please sit some more... Go straight ahead... Continue... Never finished... Not yet... or he asks What is This?" He's not kidding. There's no time to waste.

In my life, no matter how much progress I'd like to think that I've made. No matter how far within my being that I feel that I have journeyed, seen and become, there is always a little more I can do, so that I can become the True owner and host of my life... If we don't seize This moment... If we don't seize This breath, we become a stranger in our own home. In some ways it's as though we have abandoned ourselves. Living in such a way, may not be so good. Let's be diligent in facing our life path. We are more than capable of being the Owner and Host of This moment called our life.

May Your Life Go Well,

Jaye seiho Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

Recognizing the Influences

2009-12-11T07:51:00.002-05:00

Yesterday, I happened into an intriguing response, by mentioning a thought one of my friends had made about Tiger Woods. The gist was my friend Sean had said, "Maybe on of the factors in his acting out is the he has unresolved grief from his fathers death." When he said it, a kind of shift occurred and my mind said, "Never thought of that one," and a small shift and opening occurred. could see another side and angle.

The response by some to my "tweeting," that point was interesting. The theme became, "there can be no excuses." The emotionality of some of the responses took my by surprise. My own response was, I can agree to that, but then countered with, "Can there be influences?" That point for me is very important, because in my experience, there are things in both the foreground and background that are influencing thoughts, feelings, decisions and reactions. My sense is that to ignore and deny influences can be a very unskillful way to take care of ourselves.

Zen is not psychotherapy. But there are certain times and moments it can and does mimic it and there's nothing wrong with that. There are things… influences… that can and do bubble up to the surface, as we sit, working and practicing to unify our heart-mind. The things that bubble up are sometimes fragments or memories…. experiences… feelings… projections of mind… that are what I might define as "The unresolved," influences.

There are many times that I regard "The unresolved," influences as a nuisance…. a negative… unhelpful… and despite this, they show me where I have sticky fingers or I'm clinging to something like duct tape. Instead of batting those fragments… memories… feelings… projections aside, in my zazen, I sometimes turn to face them on the black cushion. Instead of running from the tiger, fearing being eaten, it can in certain moments be better to change roles and hunt those influences back and dissolve them.

Though the process of Zazen and learning to tame and settle the mind, I've "Unlearned," some things that had powerful influences on my life and mind. From one position it's coming to terms with what Rinzai Gigen Zenji called the "Dis-ease of the mind." The influences that keep up anchored and chained to our past, that involves negative emotions and experiences.

In my experience with my teacher, Genjo Marinello Osho, he's demonstrated to me there is nothing wrong with facing these influences. He simply teaches me to turn them in ways that I can more effectively… readily… pierce and in paraphrased words, "reabsorb and reclaim the energy that I used to sustain the influences power within my life."

In closing, know that working with and "Recognizing the influences" is not an effort to excuse so-called "bad behavior." Working in and around our influences is about nurturing… pruning… befriending… composting… combusting... ceasing to be deluded by ghosts that perhaps without our know have been haunting and limiting our ability to fully experience our life.

Yours In Zen,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

Life and Teachings of the Buddha

2009-12-10T06:53:00.003-05:00

This morning I wanted to share an excerpt of a talk Deepak Chopra did on FORA.TV, wherein he gives a kind of broad outline on the life of Buddha. I found it really enjoyable and perhaps a nice way of setting the tempo for our day.

In Gassho,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
digitalzendo

Directing Traffic

2009-12-09T06:17:00.003-05:00

There are times when I think of my mind as an uncalibrated GPS navigation system. I know where I want to go with my life, but because there's not enough re-calibration, I don't always end up at the location I expected. The lack of calibration in my psychological/intellectual/emotional GPS can actually take me down side roads, alley-ways, diversions, traffic jams, draining one of the most valuable resources that I can have... a focused mind. Without a focus mind, I tend to be lost and just driving around in circles intellectually and emotionally.

Zen practice... deep unswerving zen practice can recalibrate the minds GPS. It's a way of being that facilitates a deep bonding not just to self but all Being. We can know who and where we are, acting accordingly, with no problem at all.

Given that December 8th is Rohatsu, I've been sitting a lot more than I normally do. As I sat, sat, sat, sat, sat... there was a flash of lightning that said, "When mind is aligned... seamless... zero... every moment... every thing is Buddha's Awakened Mind."

My GPS was (temporarily) recalibrated. I'm really grateful. How I could tell that my mind has been re-calibrated? It's in how I've been responding to situations and circumstances, that in the words of one of my friends, that I've been doing "battle," with. The plug as been pulled allowing some of the hurt and other negative emotions drain. Oxygen has been returned to the room. I'm not spectating, I'm engaging...

Today its been raining pretty hard. One of my daughters commented opening the door this morning, "It's a river out there. This weather is so depressing." My response was, "But our mind is always shining, whether we know it or not." She replied, "No likely," and laughed. To me that moment of laughter was a flicker of that shining mind.

Recalibrating our psychological/intellectual/emotional GPS navigation doesn't happen by accident. It comes with sincere effort, confidence and determination. It comes with the motivation to be present. It comes as a process. It comes with sitting and struggling to gain management of our own mind, rather than letting mind-viruses run our life. It comes by harmonizing with our own breath. It comes though being resolute, diligent and compassionate with ourselves. It comes with not having to be all things, to all people. It can come by learning to befriend self.

When our psychological/intellectual/emotional GPS system is re-calibrated... harmonized..., we are capable of directing traffic, rather than the traffic directing us. This is our life. This is the best one we will ever have. Let's care for it well. We can do This!

Your In Zen,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

Celebrating Rohatsu

2009-12-08T06:23:00.005-05:00

Today... December 8th, is the remembrance of Shakyamuni Buddha's day of gaining Fully Awakened, Seamless Mind. He was 35 years old, having practiced meditation for many years. In his final push of 49 days, he practiced zazen, ceaselessly.

As the Morning Star rose in the sky in the early morning, seeing it, Siddhartha completely dissolved all barriers and illusions of mind and became Enlightened, experiencing Nirvana. Having done so, Siddhartha now became a Buddha or "Awakened One."

This moment became an opportunity for each of us, to come to know the Truth of our lives. My personal feeling is, This opportunity is best expressed in Hakuin Ekaku Zenji's poem, "Song of Zazen," as translated from the Chobozenji Sutra Book.

"Sentient beings are primarily all Buddhas.
It is like ice and water,
Apart from water no ice can exist;
Outside sentient beings, where do we find the Buddhas?

Not knowing how near the Truth is,
We seek it far away,--what a pity!
We are like him who,
in the midst of water,
Cries in thirst so imploringly;
We are like the child of a wealthy person,
Who worries about having enough money.

The reason why we transmigrate through the
six worlds Is because we are lost in the darkness
of ignorance;

Going astray further and further
in the darkness,
When are we able to be free
from birth-and-death?

As for Zazen practice in the Mahayana,
We have no words to praise it fully.
The virtues of perfection such
as charity, morality, etc.
And the invocation of the Buddha's name,
Confession, and ascetic discipline,
And many other good deeds of merit-
All these return into THIS!

Those who have practice zazen,
Even for just one sitting,
Will see all their evil karma erased;
Nowhere will they find the evil paths,
But the Pure Land will be near at hand.

With a reverential heart,
if we hear this Truth even once,
And praise it, and gladly embrace it,
We will surely be blessed most infinitely.
But, if we concentrate within,
And testify to the truth that
Self-nature is no-nature,
We have really gone beyond foolish talk.

The gate of the oneness
of cause and effect is opened;
The path independent of differentiation
runs straight ahead.

To regard the form of no-form as form,
Whether going or returning,
we cannot be any place else;
To regard the thought of no-thought
as thought,
Whether singing or dancing,
we are the voice of the Dharma.
How boundless the cleared sky of Samadhi!
How transparent the perfect moonlight
of the Fourfold Wisdom!

At that moment what more need we seek?
As the Truth eternally calm reveals itself,
This very place is the Lotus Land of Purity,
This very body is the Body of the Buddha."

I'm hoping that we on a path that can bring us,happiness, freedom and peace. I'm hoping we can celebrate the miracle that is our life.

Happy Rohatsu,

Seiho, Curator
digitalZENDO

Rohatsu Eve Reflections

2009-12-07T08:54:00.005-05:00

On the eve of Rohatsu (Siddhārtha Gautama Buddha's Enlightenment Day) my mind is directed towards several things. Chief among these are choices and the impermanence of This life. Those two aspects, combined with studying interpersonal relationships has been driving my practice.

The other day I listened to a Dharma talk by Konrad Ryushin Marchaj, Sensei. He talked about the koan wherein a person is dangling, high up from a tree, held in mid-air, only by their mouth. A person comes to the bottom of the tree and asks, "What is the meaning of Bodhidharma's coming from the West?" He said, "If you don't answer, you evade your responsibility. If you answer, you fall to your death. Choose."

At this time, my own teacher, Genjo Marinello, Osho and some others I know, are sitting in Zazen, at this very moment, not just at Dai Bosatsu Zendo but many other places. They are sitting ceaselessly, facing life and death, cutting, cutting, cutting, cutting, cutting, cutting at the iron wall of Zen, hoping to come to know the truth of This Great Matter. And for this I am grateful, because at this time, I am not living as a monastic but rather the life of a lay-ordained person. It is a choice. It didn't just happen. Decisions where made, which may change later, but for now, this is the path I walk. Choice... choice... choice... choose... choose... choose... as Ryushin Sensei says.

The choices that we make are not insignificant things. Our choices set us on a trajectory that determine the quality of our life.

Though I'm pretty open about sitting and it's value, I don't tell what I'm sitting with, very often. But given that it's Rohatsu, I will tell you today. I sit with the truth of my life. It's going to end and I know it... see It... feel It... There is no evasion... There will be no last minute escape... There is no last minute reprieve from Buddha, Jesus, Person behind a curtain, God. One day, like my Father, Aunt Polly, Uncle Ben, my friends John, Ronnie, Chris, Jackie, Joey, John Daido Loori Roshi and so many others, I'm going to exhale but not draw that next breath, that will be that. Done!

Amplifying the depth of my feelings is a private glimpse of honesty. I look into the clear eyes of my daughters. I see a beauty and light that I never want to be extinguished. I want them to know and feel, every sunrise, sunset and moment between, having an appreciation for the miracle of their lives. When I see and feel that truth, I have only tears, because life can move so swiftly. I love them more than life itself. This feeling drives me not to sit just for myself, but both them, as well as you too. How can I not care, when we share this world and miracle together.

I know the urgency of This moment. It's the clarity of impermanence that influences and reminds me to make my life choices with as much compassion, love, respect and care as possible. My choices not only impact me, but others as well.

Hakuin Ekaku Zenji in his writing was consistently saying, "Do your best." Eido Shimano, Roshi in translating the "Rohatsu Exhortation of the Seventh Night," by Hakuin Zenji said something deeply encouraging. "In Buddhism there is a saying that if a person becomes a monk or a sincere lay student of Dharma, nine generations of his/her family will be emancipated. To become a true monk/nun or a sincere lay student of Dharma means to have a strong vow to save all beings and to practice bravely. When one disciplines himself in such a way, the vivid Dharma nature appears in front of him/her and inexpressible joy is with him/her... Be diligent! Be diligent!"

What we do... everything we do has a consequence... matters... Our being counts for something that is very special and very precious. I'm hopeful that This can and will be brought forth... Practice well. Coming to full awakening is a real possibility... Just open your eyes...

Your In Zen,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

No Time

2009-12-04T07:22:00.005-05:00

This is a second clip with Robert Thurman talking on the value of This moment and using it well. Though short it's pretty wonderful.

Yours In Zen,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

A Tiger By The Tail

2009-12-03T07:37:00.007-05:00

The recent events of Tiger Woods is a kind of circular and illustrative lesson. The question is what lessons are we learning? Is it the narrow or the wider ones? Do we see that we are "Perfectly imperfect?"

There's the obvious part that people want to gossip about, around the water cooler, cubical or coffee shop. It's about the word "transgressions," and "not living up to values," etc... Now people can ratchet up and flip the whole situation into, "he's dishonest, he lied, he's a bad person, how could he have ever done such a thing?" They're throwing stones at their own home.

The reminder and lesson for me is the "unrealistic expectations," trap. It's the one wherein there are really some who are "above," the normal grinds of day-to-day life. In the same statement, Tiger Woods says, "I'm human and I make mistakes." That's a very important part of the lesson. We are perfectly imperfect. We are the ones that elevated him to sub-god of golf status, making him a kind of super hero.

In my own life, I'd like to think that I'm the average guy. But despite that desire, because of Zen or even being ordained people sometimes place me a slightly different category. It's a classic trap. I always like to remind people, clean my house, wash the dishes, help out and clean the kitty litter too. On occasion (5% to 10% of the time) I get mad and like to argue. I have the ability to get my attention hooked by a situation or can feel cornered, wanting to push back against what thousand of years of genetic encoding sees as some kind of threat or attack. There's only three results, argue, run or pause. Pausing is usually the last thing that happens.

In one particular situation a person actually said to me, "You argue so well, how could you possibly be Buddhist? Does your teacher know about this skill?" My response at the time was, "Please don't associate Buddhism with doormat. I have no intention of being one." They returned a frown as I walked away.

I felt like what had happened was that I stepped outside a label, box, expectation and they attempted to manipulate me back into the box by using the sentence. I already know I'm perfectly imperfect. I know that I can make a mistake or act in a way that at one time that is not harmonized. But it's what we take and learn from those moments that matters, so that we can go back later, explore and improve upon or sense of person-hood.

I practice Zen not just because I am sure that there is a "blind Buddha," in me somewhere, but also because I am not always sure.

In my day-to-day life, I constantly think about my two daughters. I am consistently attempting to make the so-called "right" choices, hoping to influence or guide them into a life of happiness. But the truth is that situations will not always turn out perfectly. To further this point, I actually said to one of my daughters in a conversation, "I know I'm your dad and a lot of the times I might look or appear sure or certain, but that's not always so. I have my flaws, doubts and misgivings. I feel my job is not to make the mistake free life for you or I, but simply to do our best and when things come out it ways we may not prefer, correct it, because our character is correctable."

Personally, when I realize that I've put an unrealistic expectation on another person, I ask myself one simple thing. "Have you not made mistakes too? Look in the mirror and say it's not so." That's usually enough to bring me back down to earth, relax and relook to harmonize with the moment of turbulence. Perfectly imperfect. It's okay.

Does Tiger Woods have a mess on his hands? Yep, he sure does. Do we all have some sort of mess on our hands? Yep, we all certainly do (even the Pope). Can and will we learn from our personal failings? I have no idea, but I am hopeful. Will I personally embark on a path of personal growth and development, so that I have the opportunity to reduce or eliminate unskillful behaviors? Yes, I will. Can you let go of holding on to the Tigers tail? Done... at least for today.

Yours In Zen

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

Viruses of the Mind

2009-12-02T06:45:00.006-05:00

I just finished reading "Virus of the Mind: The New Science of the Meme," by Richard Brodie. I decided to read it, based on a recommendation by Wayne Dyer PhD. It's a really good look at something called a "Meme" and how more often than not, they are guiding and directing our behavior, often in ways that are not necessarily self-helping.

In short a meme is "An idea, concept, belief, thought, project etc. that is transmitted verbally or by repeated action. Memes propagate themselves and can move through a ‘culture’ in a manner similar to a virus." From my view memes can appear rather overly simplistic but incredible powerful at the same time. Brodie through great supporting examples shows that our programming starts when we are very young and continues to expands at the light speed as we get older.

As Brodie discusses "Mind Viruses," which are basically Memes truly run-amok, I was reminded about how much random code we have in our brain. These memes don't even really belong to us, yet at the very same time, limit the quality of our life experience in many subtle and profound ways. In fact, after deeper consideration, it was interesting to trace how easily it to pick-up mind viruses. Though the process of zazen, I can see them in very clear and obvious terms.

A great and recent example is someone shouting, "Government health-care is going to create death panels," and without ever having read the bill or thinking through what was actually said, numerous people were pulled into an "everything and the kitchen sink" battle. All eyes, attention and spotlights were given to someone who made a two sentence post on a facebook page. That's illogical, but people fell for it. The mind virus spread like a fire in a dry forest.

As mind viruses relate to me personally, I have known many. Men have to be strong. Crying is not okay. Money is power and security. Going to college is always better than not going to college. Value and worth are established by what you can provide, rather than just who you are. Mom and Dad will always do the "right thing." And on and on the list goes. Random bits of code clogging our life experience.

The interesting thing that Brodie points out is that mind viruses don't have our best interest in mind. Mind viruses like biological viruses take on a life of their own to support themselves, not you or I. In fact mind viruses can mutate and spread beyond what the original intent of the meme. We are just hyper-convenient carriers of memes. That's important to note. People die or live very painful situations, because of mind viruses all the time.

Towards the end of the book, Brodie talks at length about ridding ourselves of our mind viruses and in some measure, gaining management over our mind in such a way that we can have improved life experiences. What was really interesting was how he suggested doing it.

One suggestion he made was using something know as Neuro-linguistic programming (NLP). If you have any familiarity with Tony Robbins, that would give you a good start which is approachable. The second suggestion is Zen Buddhism. He relates that because a significant part of practice is learning to focus and train the mind, particularly though koans, in the process memes are frequently dissolved. Because the mind focuses and stills, clarity of mind sees beyond the mind viruses and "artificial distinctions can be dropped." Please note, this by his own description is a process and not an event.

I strongly suggest giving "Viruses of the Mind," a read. The motivation? It offers a skillful pointer to get outside of our life ruts and move forward, rather than repeating and maintaining circular patterns of self-defeating behavior. I hope you find it as useful as I have.

Namaste'

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

Stringing the Beads by Marguerite Manteau-Rao

2009-12-01T08:01:00.005-05:00

Today we're doing something special. It's the "The Great Buddho-blogging Article Swap" I feel very fortunate to have been paired with Marguerite Manteau-Rao from "MindDeep." Without further adieu...

It is tempting, especially as a beginner on the path, to keep on looking for more guidance, more knowledge from outside sources. Reading the many Dharma books, attending talks, browsing through Buddhist websites, seeking answers from teachers . . . While all have their place, I have become convinced of the importance to take a leap of confidence, and to just start walking the path, without always seeking another hand to hold on to, or more knowledge to stand on. If I still had any doubts, last night’s dream put them to rest:

I am looking at a catalog of beaded bracelets made by an ex-prison inmate. I notice one in particular, made entirely with Buddha beads. I want it. I look at the price. It is quite expensive. Then I realize, I already got a beaded bracelet kit in the mail. I open the envelope, and find several Buddha beads, along with other round, semi-precious beads. I like the lapis ones best. No need to buy Buddha bracelet. I can make my own. I start sorting and arranging the beads, making sure to include all the Buddha ones. I am thinking I need to get some string, then, remember string must have come with kit. In my haste, I must have overlooked it. I find a piece of transparent string lying somewhere, and wonder if it will be long enough. Also, how can such a fine, almost invisible string do the job? I start stringing the beads.

Dream stayed with me all day. I kept thinking, no need to wait, I’ve got all I need already. I have understood enough about the Dharma teachings, to get started on the path. Just keeping my lofty vow of daylong mindfulness should keep me busy for a while! As my art teacher once said, don’t keep on thinking about your project. Instead, start doing the work, it will teach you. Awakening to the Buddha’s truth is no different. Reading, talking, writing, about the theory of practice, all have limited value, compared to the actual act of practicing. Got to keep on stringing . . .

The other part of the dream touches upon the value in not counting on the experts, in this case teachers, to do all the work. Sure they may have liberated themselves from the prison of mind already, but their prison is not ours, and the way out is different for everyone. I am the one who has to string the bracelet, not my teacher. Each new insight joining the previous one, until full Buddha nature becomes realized. I have found, if I sit long enough, it is often possible to get out of spiritual impasses on my own, without the help from my teacher. Each time, my awareness muscle gets strengthened. Of course, this does not mean, not asking for help when absolutely necessary.

Marguerite Manteau-Rao

The Secret of Buddhism

2009-11-30T06:33:00.009-05:00

Lately there have been a few people who have asked me about or wanted to dialog on what they had heard was the so-called "Secret teachings of Buddhism." My responses have been consistent. I reflected on what my teacher, Genjo Marinello, Osho and even his teacher Eido Shimano Roshi taught me. There is no secret or hidden meaning. It's all out and upfront. No mystery.

Despite my response, some have still pressed me, so as I've experienced it, I'll give in an tell you what I know of the secret of Zen. "When I fall down, I promise to get back up."

Over the past few months I've been dealt some pretty stiff cards. The situations have tended to baffle me. For the most part they haven't been of my own making and relate to specific actions and choices that others have made, independent of my thoughts and feelings. The situations have had to do with interpersonal relationships, and given that I feel that I'm good at getting along with people, I've been taken aback as some events went south.

What blind sided me was ignoring the agendas held by others. The net-result caused me to get taken for a ride, dumped out and knocked to the ground, left somewhere in territory that was not familiar or comfortable with. When I factored in that this happened with people who were supposed to be "friends," the feeling of being knocked down psychologically and emotionally grew exponentially. There have been more than a few moments that I've feel like I've had an iron cannonball in my chest, as I try to struggle to my spiritual, psychological and emotional feet.

As I sat down for Zazen this morning, things had finally simplified. The complication in my intellect and emotion for the moment seems to have run out of gas. The practice on the cushion became that when I took an inhalation I would say, "Falling down." When I exhaled my breath, I said, "Getting up." Initially, that's all there was. I lowered my gaze and just repeated what was in front of me. Inhale, falling down. Exhale, getting up.

It was the so-called secret answer that I had been struggling for, as I've made the effort to try to figure out "what to do," with my unfavorable circumstances. When we are down, find a way to get up. That's the Dharma. It's the answer that is most near.

By the end of my zazen this morning, something else happened. Eventually and naturally, my breathing realigned. When I inhaled I said, "Getting up." When I exhaled I said "Getting up." The yes and no, fair and unfair, right and wrong, the falling down, for the moment moved on. And for a moment, I felt okay. The process of Zen provides the opportunity to return, return, return to an "a-okay," feeling.

After we fall down. Please get back up. That's the secret that is no secret. That is why we sit. To come home to our True self.

Love All, Serve All, Every Single day,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

The Opportunity We Have

2009-11-27T07:53:00.003-05:00

I thought it might be a good way to close the week of blog posting, by sharing a nice clip with Robert A.F. Thurman on the Opportunities that we have to cease being deluded. It can be very easy to notice the things that are working against us, missing out on the critical things we have working for us. In this clip, I hope that you and I pick up on it and find a way to apply it to our life practice.

Namaste'

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

Zen is Not Pink and Fluffy

2009-11-25T07:38:00.006-05:00

On more than one occasion, a smile or a laugh has been brought to my face when people describe Zen practice. At times it's like people are saying, "You'll become light as a feather, your mind dancing on the wind... You'll be pious and soaked in spirituality... You will be gentle as a river... When you get enlightened, no more anger..." Maybe, but not likely.

My experience is that there are periods when living the path of Zen is indeed like a ship that is easily cruising through water, feeling as there's no opposition. But more often than not, it's warfare as brutal as any fought across a battlefield by humans. It's a battle waged within the folds of our mind. It's working to disarm a very willing and skilled fighter and opponent, with every tool available, including the kitchen sink. The effort is to stop, block, discourage, dissuade, hinder and misdirect making progress in coming to know the Truth of all being. The metaphor of, trying to steal a diamond from the claws of a dragon that is wide awake and waiting is pretty darn fair. A self-centered ego is an extremely dangerous adversary.

The practice of Zen or any form of mindfulness training, taming the mind requires the development of a formidable skill set. Without it we're pretty much on a fools errand. The good news is that the tools and skills that are required are all upfront and out in the open. The Buddha himself laid them out extremely well...

1. Right Understanding
2. Right Intention
3. Right Speech
4. Right Action
5. Right Livelihood
6. Right Effort
7. Right Mindfulness
8. Right Focus

Why do we need these tools? Because precisely as the Buddha stated in the Four Noble Truths, self-centered... self-obsessed ego dooms us to suffer... beyond all knowing and without pause. If you don't think I'm serious, take a look around... listen and see how many people are complaining and suffering. It's sobering. It's staggering. Very few are sincerely okay with their life and being as it is. There's a reason for that. It's not haphazard or random.

Though what I'm saying may seem tough and discouraging, it is more than possible to dissolve and cut through the self-centered, self-obsessed, self-absorbed ego. In fact the answer is not far away, but within our own being. In more modern times, perhaps Dogen Zenji put it best... "Body and Mind have dropped." That's It. Nothing fancy. Just dropping it... the illusions that distort or feelings, our mind and our perspective.

Zen unifies the heart-mind. Zen helps us to remove the gaps and barriers generated by the self-centered, self-obsessed ego. Zen is not pink and fluffy. The Zen Patriarchs were not just mouthing the words, "When you come to enlightenment you will shake both Heaven and Earth." This is in fact, quite literal. The battle that we fight within ourselves, is for the sake of all being. Zen is not wishy-washy. That fact is not a small thing.

I encourage both you and I to be resolute in our practice of the Way. Our very being depends on it. In fact others are counting on us too, whether they know it or not. Perhaps that's why in "The Great Vows for All" we say...

However innumerable all beings are, I vow to help them all.
However inexhaustible delusions are, I vow to extinguish them all.
However immeasurable Dharma teachings are I vow to master them all.
However endless the path to Awakened Mind is, I vow to follow It.

Yours In Zen,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

Zen of Relationships

2009-11-24T07:23:00.008-05:00

Dare I say, the most difficult challenge that we may ever face is that of interpersonal relationships. When I encounter people, I recognize that not only am I facing the person who I'm in the presence of, but the condensed version of their entire life. That can bring with it some interesting twists and turns.

Like most, I've experienced serious hurt in my life, with regard to relationships. Never have truer words been spoken that we can attempt to do everything right and it still comes out wrong. It doesn't matter if that relationship is personal, business or otherwise.

Whether we like to admit it or not, every person comes with an agenda. Clear or hidden, it's always present, as we are built to be "goal directed." This leads me to ask, what's the person's agenda who is in front of me at this very moment? What's their aim? Is it the same as mine or different? Are they partnering or working with me in a way that's going to be healthy or will it be one of covert undermining? My general policy has been to be guardedly optimistic with people, but at the same time be conscious that relationships may not work out as I hope.

From my experiences, the heart of the challenge has to do with "Value systems" or what we care about as individuals and is it possible to harmonize with the things that are near and dear to another's heart. To harmonize, we sometimes have to leave our ego at the door, which can be extremely difficult. Dropping ego can make us feel really vulnerable and be somewhat disorienting. One might say it's like being a little out of character.

In facing the challenge of unifying value systems, harmonizing goals and agendas, I've noticed that while I can sometimes influence other people, I really cannot make them change in the fundamentals. That's on them.

To experience an measure of success, I have to come to the table as an honest partner? Am I listening, not just my ears, but my entire being? Am I focused on similarities or differences? If there is a past history between us, are we willing to allow each other to live down that past, coming to the situation with a clean slate?

Layered in with everything else that I've said, I have to be prepared to work on myself. If I come to the business or personal relationship thinking or feeling, I've got my act together and that you don't, that can cause me to act in ways that are not compassionate, trusting and hopeful. Without addressing myself, taking my personal inventory, examining what I'm doing and need to change and understand what I can learn from a person, the chances of failure in the relationship increase dramatically.

The Zen of relationships is harmonize, harmonize, harmonize, as best we can. And if there is no point which can be harmonized with, allow the relationship to dissolve without causing wounds or harm to another. Having that capacity and being able to follow it through can be a great act of compassion. As I said before, you can do everything right and it still comes out wrong. I don't enjoy this fact, but acceptance is sometimes acceptance.

Namaste'

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

Fragmentation

2009-11-23T07:12:00.005-05:00

I feel strongly in repeatedly sharing the point that the word "Zen," can be translated as "Unification." This is a deeply critical point, because as Zen is typically defined, people associate it with "meditation." Whereas the point of meditation is contemplation and think, think, thinking... Zen is working with the mind in such a way so to move past thinking, towards something else altogether.

My teacher, Genjo Marinello Osho has called it "Zero," or "The One who is shining alone," or the more familiar term, "Buddha," (Awakened Mind). No matter what you call it, there is the denoting that It is seamless... not fragmented.

For myself, I can intuitively relate to the principle of being seamless or unfragmented. On the other side of the coin, I know it can be very difficult to think, feel and act in a way that is undivided. We have a lot of things tugging, pushing and pulling us, on a daily, moment-to-moment basis. This is the reason for Zen practice... We can resolve the fragmentation, by the cultivation of as Roshi Bodhin Kjolhede "One pointed, undivided, stabilized mind," breath by breath.

While I find that there's no need to be so-called "Perfect," in getting results (that can be a rather dubious notion), relentless effort and determination is extremely important.

In our daily efforts, we can come by mental fragmentation pretty easily. We generally have information overload with numerous people, places and things, vying for our attention. There's always the unexpected event or problem that we were not looking for or expecting. There are the demands and expectations of others that may or may-not be entirely realistic. Rather than feeling seamless, our moments can feel more disjointed and fractured than anything else. Sometimes the result is to settle and "just get by," before we answer to the next thing calling our attention. Fragment, fragment, fragment.

The more fragmented we become the more "greed, anger, depression, frustration, anxiety, low self-esteem and delusion" we experience. We can become so overwhelmed, we are not quite sure where, when or how to prioritize and begin dissolving the fragmentation. But as John Cage once said, "Begin anywhere."

One of my twitter friends, Marguerite Manteai-Rao who practices insight meditation and is a Hospice volunteer, recently made several posts, with regard to taking a vow to practice mindfulness. Mindfulness... attentiveness... paying attention... The commitment to be present is an excellent way to reduce and dissolve fragmentation.

The posture that we take up in Zazen (Sitting in unification), counting the breath, following the breath, working on our koan, directing... focusing mind, working with a authentic teacher can and will help us. We can and will come to a place where at times we will think, feel, speak, hear and be without fragmentation. The truth tends to be very simple. In mindfulness, fragmentation is not necessary. If we get stuck in ego however, fragmentation is 100% necessary.

As we reduce the fragmentation, it could be useful to remember that this is mostly process, rather than event. It takes effort and time. Remember that Buddha, Bodhidharma and most others spent years practicing before attaining clear realization and de-fragmentation. Consider this and practice well.

Yours In Zen,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO