The Hook of Anger

The Dalai Lama once said, "Anger or hatred is like a fisherman's hook. It is very important for us to ensure that we are not caught by it." I can understand this. Anger seems to have its root in fear… being knocked off one's center… perhaps feeling groundless… maybe feeling or thinking in away that is very alone or without support in a moment or situation, or out matched by circumstances. When we are there, in that difficult moment. What is it that we will do then?

The other day, I got placed in a situation that wasn't largely of my own making. I was left kind of "holding the bag" to deal with the results of action and inaction. The first emotion to emerge was, "how unfair." The second emotion was, "frustration," because of feeling like it was part of a series of events that was unchanging… it was a part of a pattern. The third emotion to come up was a feeling of "helplessness," because in that moment of dealing with the situation, I very narrowed, because limited options. The fourth feeling I had was "Inconvenience and anger," because the situation was going to take more time to fix that I felt like I had. I don't enjoy being consumed or overwhelmed by events, but it can happen, if we're off balance. I needed to find a still point… the center… balance...

As I was in the process of getting hooked by anger, because of the direction my mind was focused in, a funny thing happened. I received an email from my teacher, Genjo Marinello Osho. I felt my phone vibrate and looked at it. Seeing his name in the from line, instantly the brakes got put on my feeling of "How unfair," for being left holding the bag in the given situation. I heard an internal voice say, "When you struggle, remember the face of your teacher or someone that you trust. Let go of your feeling of hurt." As soon as I did that, not only did my mind relax, but my jaw too.

Reading his email, I wrote back about the situation I was in, and his instant response back, got me to push back even further from the hook of anger, frustration and fear. In that moment, my brain shifted from being focused on what was wrong, which only serves to drive the hook of anger further in, to going into solution mode. Where were the exits to this problem? And after asking that question, I saw the exit. I called a friend and he came out to help me.  It wasn't entirely happy, getting out of the problem, but not entirely sad either. It was simply in the middle, doing what needed to be done. It was becoming adult zen practice, rather than adolescent zen practice. It was unifying the moment and facing, "Now."

As I waited for my friend to show up, I emailed Genjo Osho back, saying how fortuitous it was that I received that email at the precise time that I was in the process of getting stuck. His response was basically to say, "Dharma arraignment." It was part of a seamless connection and where I'd felt little support, the reality was that I had everything that I needed to accomplish the moment. That doesn't go for just me, but you too.

As I said, when I started this post, the Dalai Lama once said, "Anger or hatred is like a fisherman's hook. It is very important for us to ensure that we are not caught by it." We can practice our life in a way that we can live though the difficult, choppy moments of our life. We can live in our solutions, rather than our problem, connecting mentally and emotionally with an experience of balance and equanimity.

May We Practice Our Life Well,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
digitalZENDO

Comments

[metalbuddha]

Thank you for this post, Seiho. I needed to read it, and it was perfect timing as I deal with the "unfair" types of situations frequently with a particular person in my life. I will remember this for the next time.

[Jaye Seiho Morris]

That it helps, I am grateful.

Practice Life well,

~Seiho