Upside-Down
Thursday, January 14, 2010 at 10:44AM Sometimes we can feel as though we are riding through our life in a boat and before we know it, the boat capsizes. All of the sudden, clear and decisively we are upside down. The experience can cause a sense of disorientation, discombobulation, not being anchored, perhaps panic and fear.
With the boat capsized, in open water, exposed and vulnerable to the elements, feeling as though we don't have a lot of leverage, the question is how do we right the boat? Maybe the answer is something that I feel as though my teacher, Genjo Marinello Osho foresaw was going to happen, when he said, "Learn to swim in choppy water."
Since Tuesday, a series of events has taken place with someone I love with my total being, without pause or division. In the continuum of this experience, I'm grappling with how to bring authentic progress forward. Under the support from my family, friends, Genjo Osho and terrifically kind employer, I'm focusing my time and energy, trying to make sense of the situation.
While I won't go directly in to the situation, I can only truly speak for myself. There has been a lot of confusion... I've shed about a million tears... I've been fortunate to have a couple friends knowledgeable about the situation that have managed to help me lift the fog a little bit around the circumstances. In my heart-mind I'm looking for an opening that will perhaps turn this moment into a healing moment. But the truth of the matter for me is, I'm not sure as to the how, when or what that moment will look like. I'm in an uncharted location.
In closing, you might think it poetic waxing, when I say, Zen... Way of Unifying Heart-Mind is the foundation for my life... it is my faith... confidence... On top of that is as I said before, I place my family, friends and much more. Last night when I spoke with Genjo Osho, I made a promise not just to him, but my family and self, that I will learn how to swim in choppy waters of This moment. This is just doing and being our best.
I ask that you keep my family in your, thoughts... prayers... meditation... chanting... Sometimes the only thing that stand between us and the abyss is the warmth and positive intention of others which support us.
Forever True Dharma Continue,
Jaye Seiho Morris, Human Being
digitalZENDO
Reader Comments (3)
For those who understand, it is not poetic waxing.
Sometimes practice is a boat that carries one. Other times it is a life preserver.
Gentle prayers to you and all involved.
<3 Mahala (@LuminousHeart on Twitter)
I'll kindle a spiritual fire to give the warmth you need!
Lothar
Learning to swim in choppy waters will save you from drowning... or help you save someone else who can't swim.
You have the support of your sangha.