Discovering Who We Really Are

Happy Friday. Winding down the week, I felt a short 10 minute video with Sogyal Rinpoche talking on "The Ultimate Goal of Meditation," which is that of discovering who we really are.

May We Practice Well,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
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Living By Confidence

Since Wednesday of this week, there has been pretty rough days, given one of my family members is struggling mightily with a serious medical issue that's chronic. In such an unfavorable circumstance, the deep feeling of powerlessness can feel unbearable. We want to fix everything... smooth the rough spots... make things somehow easier... but that's not always possible. Sometimes the moments are just messy.

In the messiness of the moment, I took the time to talk with my mom. She said, "When you are face a challenge where you seem hopelessly overwhelmed and your not sure that you can succeed, You still need to dig in and find your fight." When she said the word "Overwhelmed," it connected to my central nervous system. As she often does, my mom was able to hit the nail precisely.

By feeling powerless... overwhelmed... and uncertain... these become fuel for fear and doubt, causing it to expand. The only way to put out a fire is to remove the fuel. One example is instead of turning and running way physically, mentally, spiritually, is to turn into the storm of emotions... to face what seems difficult.

Though one way to practice Zen is from the seated position, there's another way. We can also practice Zen by thoroughly living within our life. We can practice by standing on our own two feet, working and living through the choppiness of each moment and each breath. It's facing into the challenge. It's facing into the doubt. It's facing into the strain. It's facing into the discombobulation and groundlessness and still somehow gaining a toe-hold, where we thought none existed.

Diligence in practice can remove the fuel from the fire of fear and doubt. As I wrote one of my friends yesterday, "Sometimes, I have to live by confidence that is within hope, rather than by the suffering that I might be seeing in front of my eyes."

Since Friday, I've been reflecting deeply on something Zen Mater, Rinzai said, which I had forgetten. "Do you know where the disease lies which keeps you learners from reaching true understanding? It lies where you have no faith (confidence) in your Self. When faith (confidence) in your Self is lacking you find yourself hurried by others in every possible way. At every encounter you are no longer your master: you are driven about by others this way or that.

All that is required is all at once to cease leaving your Self in search of something external. When this is done you will find your Self no different from the Buddha or the patriarch." What is truer than that?

Hands Palm to Palm,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
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Meeting A Person of the Way

I've been revisiting some past Teisho (Dharma discourse) given by Genjo Marinello Osho, as a way of supporting my daily practice. In doing so, I felt his talk on Case 36, "Meeting A Person of the Way," from the Gateless Gate. In listening to his expression, it helped me to understand (just a little) the meaning of the expression, "That One Shining Alone."

Genjo Osho early on in the talk says, "If you meet a man or woman of the Tao… If you meet a man or woman on your Way, how will you greet them genuinely? How will you greet them even if you've never met them before, as your brother or sister… or closest relative? How will you greet them without dependence on words or formulas or ideas or concepts? And how will you greet them without depending on just silence to do it? In other words, being fully present to your closest relative, how will you greet them?

Your own true self, you could say is your closest relative. Rinzai referred to This one as "That One shining alone." That One shining alone has no dependence on physical form or physicality of any kind. That One shining alone, Is the rain falling… the blanket of clouds in the Northwest… the autumn leaves turning… This knotted bamboo floor… and of course, you and me.

Sometimes Zen master Rinzai would ask, Who now is listening to this discourse? Who is now listening to this Dharma talk? If you really *know* who, then you've discovered the "True person," beyond rank and post… beyond attachment to position or achievement or attainment. Beyond "The One" who tries so desperately to survive or be secure or get ahead… That part of ourselves that is so bent to survival or security or or trying to get ahead is a natural aspect of who we are that's unavoidable… manifesting as a human being…

We're all caught in the struggle for survival or security or to get ahead from time to time. But beneath that inescapable but superficial aspect, there is a creative, free, spontaneous, True You… It has no beginning and no end… is not defined by body type or character type or birth and death… Timeless… Unflappable… Wise beyond any years… Caring… This True person is certainly the core of everyone of us.

It has no physical form or specific personality or character type It has no concrete beginning or end and yet is is you… me… yet shines forth from every manifestation or myriad form. The gentle rain is falling is It… and yet not all of It. Each leaf is It and not all of It. Each so-called person is It but not all of It… can't be contained. can't even be located…"

This is just the tip of the iceberg, as he dives much deeper, offering a really nice outline for practice that is incredibly helpful to making progress. If you would like to listen to the entire Teisho, it's available for free at Choboji Podcast. I'm hoping that you take the time to listen, because it's really breath-taking.

May Your Life Go Well,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
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Smile At Fear

Pema Chodron shares in a deep, clear and penetrating way on learning how to work with fear which can limit our True being and becoming. The video clip is slightly more than 6 minutes, but she expresses the message very well.

May We Practice Well,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
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A Poor Monk

Genjo Osho examines the tenth case of the Mumonkan or Gateless Gate collection of Zen koans and investigates what is poverty. He transcends our collective day-to-day thinking and feeling, rendering a far more vast and dare I say "richer" understanding of what is and is not poverty, within each moment.

Genjo Osho relates, "Yamakawa Sogen Roshi, tells the following story, he say's, I once knew a priest near my temple who near my temple volunteered to help refugee's, in the Vietnam War. One day he heard that the relief supplies were not going directly to the refugee's, so he decided to go to Vietnam himself to deliver them.

In the camps, the refugee camps, there were lots of sick and wounded people, adults and children, men and women. They where all malnourished. When he visted the camps, he carried loaves of bread, in his duffel bag. At one camp, he saw five (5) children outside. They had beautiful eyes, but were very skinny. When they saw him, they approached him with wishful looks. He happened to have only five (5) loaves of bread, so he gave one to each child.

One child said to him, "There are more children inside the tent. They are sick. Do you have something for them too?" But he did not have anything left so he said, "Sorry, that's all I have now. I'll bring some more later."

He thought they would eat their bread immediately, because he knew that they had not had anything to eat for days. But they didn't do this. They talked among themselves and then went into the tent, with their loaves of bread. the priest who brought the bread followed them. then he saw them... the children breaking their loaves of bread into pieces and sharing them with the sick children. They even gave away their own portion to others. These children who he had given the bread to must have been starving yet they gave up their food for the weaker children.

The priest realized his own arrogance. He learned from these children that even though they were poor, their hearts were not poor."

This is the beautiful and open launching point Genjo Osho uses, rendering and connecting the dots on the compassionate heart of being and becoming. His expression is so intimate and clear, I came away thoroughly soaked with appreciation. And though I use the word appreciation, it comes up miles short of the feeling within my chest.

I'm hopeful that you take the time to listen to the complete teisho. It's fuel for the heart-mind, giving a window of opportunity to connect with ourselves in a seamless way. If you'd like, you can also listen, by way of iTunes, for free. May you find yourself with his words.

Love All - Serve All - Every Single Say,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
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Humbled Rather Than Humiliated

Over the past few days I've been reading and re-reading a vibrant teisho given by Genjo Marinello Osho and I thought it might prove invaluable as a point of practice well worth sharing. This text is from The Blue Cliff Record, Case 66, "Ganto Laughed Loudly." This glimpse appeared in the most recent edition of the Newsletter for the Zen Studies Society, Winter/Spring 2010.

"Our this last full day of Summer Sesshin, we almost had teisho a half-hour early. Genko sent the inji [attendant] upstairs with the unenviable task of telling the Abbot that he was a half-hour early [laughter]...

We all make mistakes and are, from time to time, distracted. Ideally we should be humbled, rather than humiliated by such a revelation. When we feel humiliation, it is nearly always left over from some childhood trauma that is stimulated by our current circumstances, most often some sort of error on our part. The extent that we feel humiliated is probably directly proportional to how much baggage we're carrying from our own troubled childhood. Alternatively, to the extent that we feel humbled by an error and say, "Oh, that's right," then this is probably a good measure of how well we have processed or digested our childhood traumas. The Inji said, "Do you intend to have teisho early?" And I said, "No, there's no need to have teisho early." That's it. No more need be said.

We think that, in the process of so-called mastery, we're going to become someone we're not, or that we'll realize something that will change us. We may believe that we will in some permanent way transcend our monkey mind, get forever past prsonal history, or never make a mistake again. And, of course, all this is impossible! We'll never be without our childhood, our monkey mind, or what we call our bumpkin nature.

What our Zen practice does do for us is help us realize that we are so much more than our bumpkin nature. In the readiness of time, we begin to come to terms with the vastness of our True nature..."

So precise, so direct, so beautiful. I am ever grateful to Genjo Osho. I have a lot of appreciation and gratitude that such a point can be so well articulated and shared. It connects deeply with my heart-mind. It begs to be studied and examined closely, to see what's inside the boxes that we've constructed with our mind. I genuinely hope that you benefit from this teaching. Coming to the truth of ourselves, is an amazing gift to receive.

May Your Life Go Well,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
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Joshu's Mu

Genjo Marinello Osho has posted a new teisho on "Joshu's Mu." He gave this deeply moving talk on September 26th, on the very first day of Autumn Sesshin (trans. Practice to gather the mind).

Immediately and without hesitation he begins by saying, "Two people who were intending to be here, could not be here at the last moment. Whatever the circumstances that arose to that necessity points out the transitory nature of our lives. It always seems something unexpected is coming up. There's always a new challenge… or trial… or tribulation. And we're here together in this room, in this zendo, to learn… relearn… more deeply learn how to make the skillfulness… how to develop the skillfulness to be less distracted and disturbed in the midst of this volatile and transitory experience called life.

We can only really be skillful at being not distracted or disturbed when we unite or realize again that we are always united with what we call Dharma or Tao or Buddha nature. And I think it's simplest to say, Just nature. You could say, with your true nature, but it's just simpler yet to just say nature."

My sense is that Genjo Osho, without any trouble at all is pulling back a veil. In his own way he is asking, "Now that the curtain is pulled back, don't tell me what You think or see, what is it that You feel?" Listening to the full teisho of Genjo Osho weaves a narrative and path that is truly heart lifting and provide a beacon for our mind, pointing towards a truth we need to experience for ourselves.

If you'd like to hear the full teisho please to the Choboji Podcast Website or visit iTunes. Genjo Osho provides these talks in their entirety and free of change. It's my hope that You will take the time to explore and use them as a support to your life and practice.

May Your Life Go Well,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
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Thinking of Daido Roshi

In my experience, Zen requires a consistent disciple, effort and focus, to even get a tiny opening within "Awakened Mind." I know that it can feel like there are a million things that can mislead us, yet very few things that contribute to harmonizing with our Heart-Mind. Such is the way of, "egoistic delusions and attachments."

Sunday, Ocotber 11th 2009, there will be something very special happening. John Daido Loori, Roshi will be descending the "Mountain Seat," within the Mountain and Rivers Order. He does this as his relationship to his very temporary form comes to an end, due to cancer.

When I think of Daido Roshi and his strong effort, contributions, the extraordinary compassion, focus and disciple in nurturing the sapling tree of Zen in America, my hands easily come palm to palm. No reservation. No question. No doubt. Just thank you.

In the Spring of this year, Genjo Marinello Osho gave a teisho called, "Zen Master Yakusan's King of the King Deer." Genjo Osho at one point yelled, "Watch out!!! Don't you see the speeding arrow that is heading for you?" I'm 100% sure Daido Roshi see's it fully. I know a few Zen teachers have seen It completely. I might have only glimpsed it whizzing by. That's why there is the need for so much focus and effort, in our Zen practice. We all 100% need to see and feel This arrow clearly. I'm sure of that.

Since hearing the news earlier this week, at every morning and evening sit, I place a picture of Daido Roshi, in front of me, doing what my own teacher has taught me to do. Sit with strong "Nen," not for oneself, but for the sake of This so-called "Other," who needs our support and assistance at this very moment. This is no mistake. This is not delusion. This is just have a caring heart.

Today and the days ahead, I ask they You use disciple, focus, effort and a caring mind. Go to the Mountain and Rivers Order website and print out his picture. Carry it with you. Sit with it, consider what his life of service means at this very moment. Consider the words that Daido Roshi recited from the poet, Henry David Thoreau. "I hear beyond the range of sound. I see beyond the verge of sight." That's what This moment is. I feel that Daido Roshi meant It, when he used those words. He hasn't been practicing just for himself, but all sentient being. That's *Real* Love. Daido Roshi's actions fill me with gratitude.

With Profound Appreciation,

Jaye Seiho Morris, Curator
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